Should Penarth adopt an independent currency? A financial report 09/01/26

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In this article, we tackle the pros and cons of Penarth adopting its own official currency over Pound Sterling, all backed up by a real economist.

This P-topic has been a hotbed of discussion as of late. Following the Penarth Independence Act's movement to the House of Lords last night, the Penarth Hooter consulted an economist to get the facts behind the cash; This is what we learnt.


One benefit of the adoption of a new currency would be the severance of Penarth's economy from that of the rest of Britain's- Which, considering their different levels of development, could entice more business for Penarth on the global market.

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Penarth mainly exports expensive goods, like vehicles and medicine. I can also see it becoming a fashion capital, like Paris.

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- Anonymous
In addition to this, economists hypothesize that a Penarth exclusive currency would also send a firm, strong message to world leaders that Penarth refuses to be caught in Britain's shadow, and instead houses a bustling and inimitable culture. "These things matter and they will notice," our consultant economist replied.

With all this in mind, the next big hurdle for an unaccredited currency is one of advertising- That is to say, it remains to be said what the money will look like, and what it will be called. We handed it over to our guest economist;

All money should be used solely to create a sense of patriotic pride in those who use it. These days most of the people who use money are old people. What's the oldest thing you can think of? Put that on the banknote.

As for the name, I do think it's important, but not as much as the picture.

Bearing this advice in mind, we created an ideal proposal design featuring a very Welsh shade of red, with a picture of Penarth from an aerial view on the front. Because the name doesn't matter, it's called P-cash.


What's more, this money is mechanically quite different to that which the world is familiar with. The Penarth Independence Act stipulates that all notes must be at least 5 orders of magnitude greater than the most valuable coin- This naturally self-sorts the physical money so that coins are used for lollipops and ice cream, and that the notes are used for rent or house purchases. Our economist on the benefits;

This means that the only people who will become familiar with coins will be children, who will subsequently become unfamiliar with the notes ("real money").

This will cause their understanding of money to stagnate and could ultimately make them economically inactive and force them to live in Penarth for the rest of their lives.

We at the Penarth Hooter look forward to a day when finally nobody can leave Penarth.



The Penarth Hooter is investigating this topic, and as such, some of the information here may eventually prove not to be true.

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